It's official, it's not "There goes the neighborhood", it's "There goes the neighbor". I have lowered my standards...I have no pride. The poor people (my family included) living within a two block radius are about to condemn me. I have been publicly spotted wandering the hood in my bathrobe on several occasions. I haven't brushed my hair for 3 days. I actually spruced up for Sunday family dinner with a wet wipe. I now understand those haggard women I see in public looking disheveled, glassy-eyed and in desperate need of a makeover. Granted we have been moving furniture around and packing boxes, but I have been letting myself get pretty gnarly. I finally showered this afternoon and when I got out of the shower I screamed. Not because my body rejected shampoo & conditioner as a foreign substance, but because I didn't recognize myself. Who was that stranger?! Out of my bathrobe, grungy sweats & work clothes, I didn't look any better. I had to remind myself that soap is not surgery. Then I paused...what was I hoping to find? A supermodel? I have been eating more than saltines and the last time I had professional grooming was...I can't remember. As for people wanting my photograph, there was that call from National Geographic. Have I really let myself go? And just how far gone am I?As I stood there examining myself, notice I didn't say "checking out", I dug deep to find my inner Pollyanna/Tony Robbins. Nudity and vulnerability makes one quite gullible. Cue pep talk- I realized that I look pretty good as long as my eyeballs are above the water line. I have my health, all of my original teeth, my hair is nothing a weed wacker can't treat, my clothing covers all the important places and I have most of my brain. It's a fact that you lose brain cells when you are pregnant. NO I AM NOT, but I have been and I haven't recovered. My body is a road map. It shows where I've been and where I hope to go. Those well padded hips- great for child birth and packing around toddlers. The poochy stomach- perfect for hiding my feet when I leave the house in slippers. The booty- reflects my baking abilities and brings me one step closer to my future hip hop dancing career. The bingo wings (aka arms)- perfect for carrying, calming, landing airplanes, you name it. My point is that 'stranger' staring back at me is not such a stranger after all. I just need to spend a little more time with her. If that doesn't work, maybe I'll try "beer goggles". Everyone looks good after three! Just kidding!
5 comments:
april i have never seen you naked (phew thank goodness!) but clothed, you look great! at our age who really does look great in the buff? i am pushin' 40 and i am at the point i don't even look at myself anymore (in the buff that is) it truly disgusts me. i have a hard enough time looking at myself clothed!
I love that picture of you in you bathrobe. Actually, I need to watch for you and snap a picture when you are going out to get your milk in the morning. I love the way you clip your hair while you sleep! April, you crack me up. You look great! Never stop baking because it really is easier to carry a toddler if you can rest them on a hip!
you are so funny! can I please copy and paste and plagiarize this piece as my own. TO be honest, I would have to "run" it every Wednesday morning. And you are gorgeous. I could never believe you could ever let yourself go.
Well put April, our bodies are the road maps and I guess sweet children are our payoff. I've made our family blog private and wanted to send you an invite but didn't have an email for you. Just send me an email at poshpetals@gmail.com
Sounds like things are busy hope your little peeps are well.
I haven't seen you for awhile (we need to do something about that)but you always are beautiful and you make me laugh. PS are you moving?
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